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Archive for February, 2014

The Article

Like me, most if not all of you thought this blog was dead in the water. Truth is, change has and will never cease to happen. We know this all too well. Only much of the shift happening with me lately has been internal, and at times not even noticeable until later. I’m sure you’re in that same boat too.

A good friend of mine recently encouraged me to write again about the different expressions of change (thank you Marina). So I am. But this already has a different feel. It feels of mastery rather than, “Well, this crap happened to me today and this is how I see it…”. It’s coming from a different place. It’s from a point of view of arriving somewhere and looking down at how the experience now echoes the core of the journey.

Many of you know that I’ve been trained as an Adoula, working with both parent/s and incoming baby on a spiritual level, assisting in creating a soul connection before the baby is born. The purpose of this blog is not to tell you what an Adoula is or does. I wrote an article for that purpose, and have been working with an editor for major western Canadian birthing magazine published locally for months to have it published.

This week I got a phone call from my editor’s editor, explaining that the magazine has been cut in half physically (lack of funding) and that they have no space for my article at this time. She was apologizing for all the hard work I’ve put into it which truly was fun for me. But if I wanted to write a shorter general article on the spirituality of pregnancy, without the focus on the Adoula work, I was welcome to.

Okay, here I could have gone into fear and anger and resentment. But it just wasn’t there. As I was talking with this editor I understood that they still feared a non-existent competition between the Doula and Adoula worlds. They aren’t ready for this connection themselves, and it was showing up with the resistance to this article’s inclusion as the whole board thought it best if they cut my article out. And still I felt nothing but calm and compassion.

The editor was apologizing all over and I almost laughed at one point because she was trying so hard to sooth an argument that wasn’t there, a well-rehearsed reaction for an outburst of rage or even tears I suppose. That was the reason for the phone conversation rather than an email from her. And I did appreciate the maturity to talk with me personally. She was definitely surprised with my response. I could hear that in her voice. And she thanked me for being so understanding.

In hindsight, I was surprised with my response too. Let’s face it. The Jody that I grew up with was a people pleaser. She took what everyone else was telling her to do, without checking in with her own heart, and she did it. No questions asked. She was the “good girl”, not rocking the boat, not causing ripples in the water. In fact, that’s why I got married to my first husband. Not listening to ME and what I felt was best for me or what my choice was. But that’s where life’s experiences come from and how we grow from those past expressions of ourselves. No regrets, because I am a different person today.

When this editor offered the new, shorter article “job” I told her “no”. I couldn’t and wouldn’t do it. I became the Standard for my truth. And it felt great. The old Jody would have adjusted and fit into the flippers she was being asked to wear. Again, no regrets on this choice of mastery.

Then yesterday I received an email from the editor I had been working with. She hoped I wasn’t “too hurt”. Sweet really. haha She finally admitted to me that she “felt challenged by the subject matter with which (she was) so unfamiliar”, perhaps at first, perhaps still. And that’s the truth of it. The Doula world (here locally at least) isn’t yet ready to share the stage it seems. They don’t understand that we can operate together, and for the fuller experience of our clients.

This is such a clear reflection of what is happening all around us on a larger scale. Those who are awakening to the truth of who we are see it, that freedom of trust in ourselves and life in general. It scares those that want things to remain the same. But it can’t. The wave was started long ago and all will surf it. Just takes some longer to trust the waters.

I replied to my editor that there is a ravine between our two worlds, one that I hoped could one day be filled with unity and team essence. But essence of this expression of change is: I have my truth, and I stood my ground without compromising who I am. Not in an argumentative or stubborn way. I just simply said “no”. And that makes the difference.

The opportunity may be welcomed on both sides with a “Hell Yes!”

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